East Africa is the largest region of the world not served by the internet via any sort of cables.  Everything is in or out via satellite.  Africa has been call the dark continent before, but for me that is because there is no fiber.  At least not yet.

You have no idea how excited I was when I saw them trenching to the building next door.  The building happens to house KRA offices, Kenya Revenue Authorities.  They are getting fiber to their building. Sometime later this year there are plans to have some fiber land in Mombasa connecting us to South Africa and from there the world.  There was another scheduled connection to the United Arab Emirates, but that has been delayed by pirates.  Not internet pirates who steal music and movies, but real life pirates on ships off the Somali coast who steal Ukrainian tanks and oil tankers.

You probably do not care about my bandwidth woes… I used to measure my office connection in the 10s of gigabits, now its in the hundreds of kilobits.  However, I am guessing that if you are reading this you do care about pictures of us and our lives here.  And that is where this all comes together.  I have been really slow at getting some pictures posted, but here they are at last.

Petr's first day at school

Joyce and Mercy's visit

Moses and Wilson's visit

I have waited a while before writing about a recent loss in our family. I wanted to wait on the Lord to see how He would have me view this trial. I journeyed through it, knowing that there have been many who have traveled the same road. On Christmas morning we told our two boys that they would be getting a baby brother or sister in nine months. They had been hoping for a sibling and were excited to know that it was going to happen. Of course, Paul and I shared the same enthusiasm. However, a couple weeks later I had a miscarriage. I am amazed at the bond formed between mother and child at an early stage of 6-8 weeks. I know I echo the hearts of many women when I say that it hurts. There is a strong sense of loss, an empty feeling of what was once full of hope. One of my dear friends, Heidi, wrote me in response to our loss and her words were profound. I share them with you; “Isn’t it weird how bringing a new life into this world can leave such an impact on our hearts, whether they live or not?” I am finding this to be true. Even though our baby didn’t have the chance to be born into this world, he/she was alive in me. The time was precious and I will cherish each moment of my pregnancy as it was over too soon. I look at my two boys and wonder about the child who was inside. There are many unanswered questions…but one thing I am sure of – God Knows! The Bible tells me in Psalm 139:13-15

“For You formed my inward parts; You covered me in my mother’s womb. I will praise You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made; marvelous are Your works, And that my soul knows very well. My frame was not hidden from You, when I was made in secret, And skillfully wrought in the lowest parts of the earth.”

I have assurance that God knows everything there is to know about our little baby. For some reason, one I may never understand, we were not to know these things. There are times when I have asked the poignant question, “Why did this happen?” But again, I may never know. As emotions come and go, I must trust that God has a plan for my life and our family. I find that living a life for God is about true surrender of self – a surrender of my plan. Oh, how hard this is for one who likes to have a plan! (me!) Surrender of self is not a new concept in my life since I have been a Christian for a long time. However, I have been tested in this area more than ever since the moment God revealed He was sending us to Africa. Living out a life surrendered to God is a decision that has to be made every moment of the day. There are so many times I fail. There are days when I want to run back to the plan I had for my life….but I know I won’t find joy outside of God’s will. I must surrender. The miscarriage is one of those things that was out of my control. I’d like to get mad about it but who would I get mad at? Certainly not God. How could I get made at the One who created the life in the first place? He has a purpose for each life and even when it is shorter than we think it should be – who are we to throw a fit about it? Yet, I am very guilty of throwing fits….about a lot of things that don’t make sense to me. I just have to surrender. The Lord has been faithful to show me the rewards of living a life surrendered to Him. Trials are times when one will decide if they will get “mad” at God and run away or run to His loving arms of comfort and love. I choose to run full speed into the arms of my Creator in total surrender! By the way, His hugs are pretty great!!!