In another post I said I would work on this one, so here it is.  It is a tough one though, so be warned.

God gave you everything, without Him, you would have nothing.  I do not think that should be too hard to accept.

Living here has taught me that a lot of things I thought I needed, I do not really need.  Not that we have it hard at all, but life is not the same.

So, what I mean to say is, “You do not need it.”  Seriously.  Start listing some things in your head that you need…

If you get past water and food, only occasionally, you have gone too far.

So all that stuff you have, that you do not need, God wants you to use it for Him.

We are made in God’s image, His name is on us (sermon notes on the subject).  Render unto God what is God’s.

The whole purpose of life is serving God. I just finished a morning devotion here at AIM-IS on the subject, and it is amazing how woven through the bible the subject is, but it receives very little attention.

Genesis 2:15 God put man in the Garden to serve, the curse broke this relationship.

Exodus 8:1 The purpose for freeing the Israelites was so that they might serve God. The passover accomplished this.

We are supposed to “wait on” the Lord.

Wait on:  to perform the duties of an attendant or servant for.

Luke 1:74 The reason for God sending a savior was so that we would be restored to a right relationship with God, to serve Him.

Hebrews 9:14 The reason for Christ’s death was so that we could once again serve God.

Revelation 22:3 Once the curse is gone, we shall serve God for eternity.

If that is our purpose for being here, then everything we are, everything we have, is meant to serve Him.  If the stuff you have, the time you are spending, is not serving God, then it is a misappropriation of His resources.  You are stealing from God.  So get busy using it for Him, or get rid of it.

A while back I posted about some things regarding life here in Nairobi.  I have continued to think about such things.  Beware, I am in full ramble mode, if you do not have a lot of time, skip this post and come back later.

I was talking to a Kenyan coworker the other day and I said, “People are like fuel prices.”  He had no idea what I meant.  You probably do not either.  People can adjust to a different level.  As oil prices go up, we quickly see fuel prices at the pump go up.  When oil prices go down, eventually we see fuel prices also drop.  I think we are the same way when it comes to what is normal.

If you take someone from Kenya and put them in Richmond, VA for instance.  They will quickly adjust what they think is normal.  They will expect certain things to be a certain way.

Much in the same way, putting us here we are adjusting, albeit more slowly, to what is normal here.

Yesterday we were driving along Ngong Road (a main artery in western Nairobi, although not wide enough to be considered an artery, maybe more like a main, very important capillary, but I digress…).  They have been working on it since before we arrived (yes, back in June).  (For what it is worth, yes, I do realize I am over using parenthesis.) They first brought huge piles of dirt and dumped them on the “sidewalks.”  This made it very difficult for people to walk around them with all the traffic whizzing just centimeters away.  Eventually we saw them blading the dirt smooth.  This seemed like a great idea, a nice walkway for people along the road (maybe now is a good time to mention that the huge majority, at least 90%, of the people in Nairobi do not own a car, so they tend to walk or take matatus.)   Speaking of matatus (you have to read the parenthesis to keep up), another missionary told me a while back, “Any (near) horizontal place is a good place to drive.”  So guess what happens when they put in a nice sidewalk, you got it, Matatu Madness™.   In order to control this, you commonly see sidewalks strewn with huge rocks, with well worn foot paths meandering through them (and you though meandering walks were a more recent American city planning aesthetic technique).  Even this, I thought, was progress.  You had to pay attention, but a nice sidewalk for pedestrians.  However, you cannot stop progress (at least that is what I have been told, but I have a lot of anecdotal evidence to counter that).  Just recently we saw them jackhammering out every other 2 foot section of curb.  Odd, indeed, but it gave them more chunks of concrete to place on the sidewalk to keep the matatus off.  And just yesterday we saw what they were trying to accomplish.  They had put in these large blocks of concrete to fill in those gaps.  They are at least 10″ high, too high for matatus to cross, and too uneven for them to try to ride half on half off (do not think they would not try!).  Then they have paved the sidewalk!  Pavement… what a blessing.  (You know, it rains here, and since I grew up almost all my life in a desert, I was not that familiar with what happens to dirt when it gets wet.  You would not believe the mud around here…)  So where was I?  (This is one long paragraph…) So Cammy said to me, “This is so nice.”  And I replied, “It really is changing around here, things are getting better.”  (That reminded me of the joke about the first Marine recruited back on the morning of November 10, 1775.  In the afternoon, another recruit signed up.  Being greeted in the barracks by the first man who said, “You know, back in the old corps, we had to parade in 2 feet of snow…”)  A little later were driving down the road the other direction (I did mention it was a main road).  It occurred to me, “I guess we are still a long way from handicapped ramps…”

Wow, are you still reading?  I guess you are hoping for some kind of payoff for staying with me this long. But basically, if you were paying attention, you already know it.  We are adjusting as to what is normal.  We are adjusting down, slowly but surely.  And I think that is a good thing.  I have a post about expectations that is waiting… maybe I will get to it.  I also have one on things you do not need, but think you do.  Be patient, I am busy… Thank you for your time.  Oh, if you make it this far, send me an email.

I am at a leadership conference for AIM this week.  We have been talking about a lot of really great stuff, most of which I know I am not disciplined enough to write here.

One thing I found very useful was the time spent thinking about change. Here are some of my thoughts on the subject.  Some of it reaches back to some of the stuff I wrote quite a while back.

You are not the man or woman God wants you to be.  You have to change.

How is God moving you now?  Are you resisting? Why?

What can you learn from the answers to those questions?

What do you have to do that you do not like?  Why do you not like it?  If God is moving you to do something you do not like, it is probably not because you are the best one to do it.  There is almost always someone better at something than you are.  That means that the purpose in having you do it is not to have it done the best, but to have you do it.  God knows you, He knows your gifts.  He also loves you, and He wants you to learn and to grow.

I have written about it before, but there is something I hear often, and I really like it.

God is good, all the time. All the time, God is good.  Because that is His nature.

Often it is done as a response, that is, one person will say, “God is good,”  to which the other will respond, “All the time,” and so on.  I even get to hear it in other languages.

Mungu ni mwema, wakati wote. (Swahili)

Ngai ni mwega (all I remember of Kikuyu)

I do not know where it came from, maybe the Anglican church brought it, but I really like it, espcially since it engages the other person into saying and understanding it.

Do you believe God is good, all the time?  How about today, is God being good to you? What does it mean to you that “God is good?” Is that really what He thinks is good?

He is being good, that is His nature. If you cannot see or understand that right now, it is not because of anything He has failed to do.

I was going to write about this in another post, but I think it is appropriate here.  God wants us to grow up. We are all a bunch of self absorbed whiners, who cannot see the “big picture.”  When any one of our little useless plans gets botched, we go whining to God, “How could you do this to me?”  Yes, I mean that, and I do not care how important your plans were.

We have God’s response to that kind of whining, and it came from a man who would seem to have every right to complain. Read Job 39-41. I know you will probably not read it all, so let me highlight it:

Where were you when I laid the foundations of the earth? Tell Me, if you have understanding.

Can you bind the cluster of the Pleiades, Or loose the belt of Orion?

Shall the one who contends with the Almighty correct Him? He who rebukes God, let him answer it.

God is being good to you right now. Let us all grow up a bit today.

It has been three months since we arrived in Nairobi.  I am finally getting around to blogging.  There is much to say.  I am not sure where to start.  I want this blog to be like a journal, an avenue to express myself, but also a method of communicating and recording our family’s experience as missionaries in Africa.  I pray that I am open enough for you, the reader, to see into my heart. I hope that my words are transparent, that I will not keep anything hidden.  Only then, will you be able to know all that the Lord is doing in our lives.

We spent the first two months going through AIM’s orientation to African culture.  The program consisted of three weeks in Machakos while staying at Scott Theological College, followed by four weeks of living with a Kenyan family.  Needless to say, our family went through one transition after the other.  There was a full gamut of physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual challenges.  This is my main reason for not blogging earlier.  I have been trying to process it all.  Many times I have sat down at the computer, only to be staring at a blank screen.  I have missed our dear family and friends so much that it hurts.  Each amazing experience has been underlined by the fact that some of the most special people in my life aren’t physically here to share it.  There are times when I feel like my heart is going to explode.  I have never been put in this situation before.  Family and friends have always been a short drive away - or at least a phone call away.  Forgive me for not blogging earlier.  Originally, I desired to do so every week.  I wanted you to know exactly what was going on at the time.  However, when I started to write anything, I would start crying.  My words were weak in expressing the complexity of my emotions - pure joy at finally being in the place that God called us, mixed with an aching sadness of people and home. After three months of silence to the world of blogging, the numbness is passing and I am ready to share.  Instead of backtracking over the last three months, I am going to start with the present, knowing that the past will emerge.

This week was a huge milestone for me.  Paul went to Uganda for a couple of days to help out with IT. I took this opportunity to go on an adventure with the boys since we had the car.  This was to be my fourth time driving in Nairobi.  We set out to experience the city life, me with my handy street map and the boys with their sense of adventure. Let me start by saying that driving here in Africa is just pure craziness.  If you read some of Paul’s blogs, you will know what I am talking about.  If not, let me explain.  First of all, it is hard enough to remember that the car needs to be  on the LEFT side of the road. Then, throw in some traffic circles - most of which lack street signs, pedestrians crossing in front of you with no warning, and from every direction, men pulling wagons that take up most of the lane…oh, and there are rarely lanes painted on the roads.  Did I mention the potholes?  Everyone is trying their best to avoid them which means that you will go into their lane and they will come into yours.  Finally, come the Matatu drivers (public transportation), who follow no rules. The concept of defensive driving has a new meaning in Nairobi.  Well, I must say that I felt liberated to be able to drive my boys across town and return in one piece! Ten minutes into the journey, we found our selves in a traffic jam.  Our car was completely stopped.  The air conditioning ceased to work and it was a warm day.  In Nairobi, it is not safe to have the windows rolled down, especially in a jam. Therefore, we sweated it out.  The boys were troopers and I just kept reminding myself that this was PART of the adventure.  Traffic started picking up, but only to find us going through a traffic circle with no signs.  I had to guess which way to go.  After heading down the street, I finally spotted a street sign informing me we were on the wrong road.  After turning and backtracking, I did it again.  Oh, how I was wishing to be back where I knew the roads and there were no traffic circles! After an hour and a half of driving, it should have been only 40 minutes, we arrived at our destination.  We went to a mall where there was an outside market for the Masai people.  The boys and I enjoyed looking at all the hand made items and getting to talk with the people.  Petr learned how to bargain and bought a small stone in the shape of a heart.  He talked the lady down from 30 shillings (about 45 cents) to 20 shillings (about 30 cents).  I was so proud of him!  Somehow, Andrej got one for free from another lady.  I think he batted his big blue eyes….those eyes really stick out here!  After our LONG drive to the market, I decided to try a different route home, thinking that it would be easier.  I was very wrong.  I got completely lost after hitting another traffic circle with no street signs.  We ended up in the middle of downtown.  I realized that we were heading in a direction that lead to a very unsafe area.  After lots of prayer and an opportunity to study the map while stuck in traffic (once again!), I was able to find the way home.  During the chaos, Andrej fell asleep. But, Petr was wide awake. He was well aware that we were lost.  I was glad to have him to talk to and knowing I had to keep calm for him, helped me stay calm. I just kept driving with as much confidence as possible.  When I saw that we were going to make it home, I couldn’t help yelling out, “I know this street.  Petr, I know how to get home!” Petr replied, “Praise the Lord!”  And we did!

I have been thinking about this for a long time, and meant to write it here, but I never got around to it.  A friend emailed me recently and I wrote him a reply, the significant portions I have reproduced here.

God really does want us to abandon all and serve Him with everything in our being.  However, many people go off the deep end in a direction that He would not have them go.  I see some of those here.  The key is to figure out what He is saying.  John 10:4 has been really help for me, because I often wonder, “What would God have me do?”

“And when he brings out his own sheep, he goes before them; and the sheep follow him, for they know his voice.” NKJV

It is our job as sheep to know His voice. Before we go anywhere, we need to learn how He talks to us.  Every day, every moment, where is the shepherd?  I often feel like the lost sheep, but He promises to go after us.

It has been a real joy living here.  At first the prospect of living in the midst of such poverty was a bit scary.  I knew, living so close to Kibera, that people were going to be coming by all the time asking for money.  I hate that.  I used to hate that.  On the advice of another missionary, I see each of those circumstances a chance to see “where the shepherd is.” I try to understand what the Holy Spirit is telling me to do, just at that time.  Should I give a job, food, milk, money, or not?  Eventually that kind of thinking starts to invade (in a good way) the rest of your life.  God is always there, we just act like we have to go somewhere to see Him.

Abandon all and follow the Shepherd.  You will not regret it.  I cannot give you that guarantee, but then it would not mean anything coming from me.  Take it from Him.

Three times a week, at Chai time, we have devotions at the hangar.  As our staff pastor was talking about Isaiah something hit me.  We serve and awesome God.

Think about that for a moment…

He is the creator of all the universe. He is great beyond measure, beyond description.  And He loves you beyond as well.

That should change everything in your life. You should be willing to do anything for Him. If you are not excited to serve Him, you do not know Him well enough.

I came to this conclusion over the weekend, and it is important.  I am not a volunteer, I am a servant.  I am not doing God a favor by being here, by serving Him. I am simply obeying. A servant does not get kudos for doing his job, he does what he is told and that is the end of it. God does not need you.

Having said that, know that God is love.  He knows what is best.  He will take care of His children.

I am being taken care of better now than when I had a “real” job.  I have less of what I want, but more of what I need.

What do you want,  easy or good?  Once you realize that God’s way is the best, you do not miss the conveniences of life.

Life here is very different.  I cannot explain it in a blog post, I am not even sure I can explain it at all.

As humans we tend to like to simplify things.  So coming here, the idea that life in Africa is slower is an easy one to get your head around.  Some things are slower, much slower.  It is true that everything moves at a different speed, but it is not uniformly different.  Some things actually move faster (including, but not limited to, public transportation).

We finally have a fuel cylinder for our stove.  We purchased a stove that is half electric, half gas.  This give us the flexibility to cook if we have no gas, or if there is no power.  Everyday for about 2 weeks I went to a grocery store on my way home.  Each day he assured me they would bring it tomorrow.  Eventually, he was right.  That is just a little story to set the stage for what I want to say.

When everything changes, your basis for what is normal, and what is acceptable begins to float.  It has no anchor.  It is going to take a while to even understand what is normal and acceptable here.  When I am driving, sometimes I feel like I’ve really angered someone and they do not seem to even notice.  Other times I will do something I think is normal and get lots of honks and hands waving.

All of this points to more of the same cultural things that I have been thinking about and what we talked about extensively at ABO.  But it is not just about culture, it is about what you think is normal, or acceptable.  Much of what we think is not informed by God, but by our experience.  Not that all experience is bad, but we need to be careful about how we construct our normal and what we accept.

It boils down to, “What does the Bible really say?” And since that is a very complicated question, it would behoove us all to spend more time figuring it out, and for every context in which we find ourselves.